Recuerdete

I sit in front of the screen, my fingers typing furiously, my eyes burning a hole through my screen they are looking so fast for the right answers. As of lately, I have been longing for that feeling. That feeling that I remember got me into this skin that I now occupy. The feeling that I remember drove me into all of those arms, an into all of those lonely nights, and into all of those moments full of love that I wish never ended.  I remember now how I got here. As long as I can remember I've always been searching for that feeling over and over again. To feel euphoric, honeymoon like, love and affection. It seems as though I've gone around the whole world in search of it only to bring me right back home. What does it mean? Am I in the place where I can find it? Or the place where the starvation began? I'm not sure. I've spent the last week reminiscing about past lovers, scratch that, lovers isn't the right word, I'm not sure what it is, maybe more like good company.
I'm watching a TV show and the character reminds me of Dan.
I have a dream, very vivid and beautiful dream about Nathan's embrace, and I want to be right back there.
My clients are playing video games and suddenly I remember as if in a past life, the hundreds of times that I sat down and played that game with you in moments of bliss, and anger, and aloofness.
I can feel my body searching for that feeling searching for you, or for anyone who can fill the job position. Good company. Good sex. Good affection. Part-time clown, part time therapist, part-time play thing in the bedroom. I want to be wanted. I want to be heard. I want to be known inside and out. I want to fill this void.