Not sure...

So, here I am walking off to my bedroom at night to be alone 

for the hundredth time. 

Or so it feels. 

I would rather be with you right now, 

and this is not how I imagined 

I would spend the month of December. 

Not where I thought I would be,

or who I'd be with, 

or what I thought I'd be doing. 

I'm still pretty much just runnin' 

on shock fumes. 

But I'm starting to understand what you said about people meeting for short times,

atleast

I'm trying to. 

Otherwise, I'd think I just got played. 

Who wants to think that?

But seriously, I don't think that. 

But I'm feeling like shit. 

I don't know how I'm gonna make it through a day sometimes. 

Who the hell wants to feel like that and know that those words are coming out of their mouth?

Yea, I feel dumb for saying that so-extreme talk.

Sometimes you just have to write it to see it. 

UGH

Well yea. People just meet other cool people along the way. 

I think that's what you said. 

Sure. I'll go with it. 

Do I really believe that?

Not about this case. 

But hell, if you need me to I'll throw it in there. 

'that pile'

BOOM

FIN.

(but I really don't believe it)

But, you seem to have your heart pretty set on this 

so I have to stop acting like a crazy lady about you. 

Because boyfriend's got bet-ter stuff to do.

Alright. Here I Go!

Gonna wake up and... be a better person!... in a better mood!...

cause nobody likes a mopey bitch...and "what did you expect, Ericka?" 

right!?!?

I must. 

Yea, no prob. I can do this.

One

Step

at

A

Time.